I got a piece of good news yesterday. When I went in for my treatment, Dr. Anderson walked in the office (late as usual) with an ‘I-know-something-you-don’t’ grin on her face and handed me the results from my last echocardiogram which was done two weeks prior. 

“Your numbers are up!” she said.

And indeed they were. My left ventricle heart function, which was down to 40-45 from a baseline of 60 had made a slight rise to 50-55.  Phew.  This is indeed good news.  This means maybe, just maybe, it was a temporary effect of the AC and maybe, just maybe it will rise even higher.  Most likely it won’t rise higher but 50-55% function is good (no one has 100%) and can be considered ‘low-normal’.

So bring on the training.  Time to get swimming, running and biking. No more blaming my heart for being lazy.

Speaking of excuses, back in November I wrote down some goals on this blog in an attempt to get on with my life after my hellish year of cancer, surgery and chemo.  Let’s check back in and see how I am doing, shall we.  I said:

1. Stop procrastinating and blaming my cancer for my messy house and lack of organization.

***I think I have done that.  I am still not as organized as I would like to be, but honestly, before cancer, I wasn’t very organized either. As far as blaming the cancer…I can see that the farther I get away from it, the easier that will be.

2. Get back on the Zone and lose 15 lbs.

***Well, I am trying to eat better and  I think once I can train harder the weight should come off.  For now though I have to get comfortable with my new, menopausal, shape.  It’s a little rounder in certain places, but nothing that 50 miles a day on the bike won’t cure.

3. Publish my essays and turn them into a book that will inspire and help others.

***  Let’s just skip this one for now. I need to work on my writing, this I know.  Maybe I should have stayed off Facebook which seems to eat up an inordinate amount of my free-writing time. I have to remember that  if I want to be an official blogger, then I need to post more often. I am having the same problem with my writing in general.  Unless I feel inspired by an idea or thought, I tend to stay away from the keyboard. From now on I will try to add stuff more frequently — even if it is not so profound.

4. Get a job.

***  I am happy to report that this one I accomplished.  Although it is just a waitress job for now, I am working at a local restaurant which is very convenient and the money should be decent.  This was a tough one for me.  After being out of work for a year it was hard to go back.  Plus I am feeling like I look old with my stupid hair and many of the staff are far younger than me.  It will be fine though.  The first week I was a nervous wreck and felt sick to my stomach going in but hopefully that ‘junior-high-no-one likes-me’ feeling will go away.  As strong as I thought this cancer has made me, deep down I will always be the 12 year old new girl at school.

So that is it for now.  Since my treatments are standard now with no big surprises (thankfully), I am considering putting some of my other writing on here for your reading pleasure–or displeasure–and test out some of my memoir stuff.  We’ll see.  At this point your reading of this is completely voluntary, so that is good.  If you don’t want to read my dribble, than you don’t have to.

Thanks for listening.